We have been granted permission to publicise the following anonymous comments.


"This is the best thing I have done coming to my
 counselling session.  It has changed my life totally"


"The past few sessions have helped me workout the mess my head was in prior to visiting.
Before I didn't know how to control the past from effecting the future but now slowly
it's becoming clearer in my head.
Counselling after a controlling relationship is imperative and think more people could benefit from it"


"SixtyEightyThirty is an incredible service, I never thought I could feel this way or deal with
my issues the way I have.  I actually feel like me again not the robot I felt I had become.
I have a new lust for life and the counsellor has helped me in ways I couldn't have dreamed of. 
7 sessions and I'm a new happier version of me"


 

This lady hopes that by reading her story professionals will understand more and women may seek support.  We thank her for her courage.

I'm a 36 years old nearly divorced woman and this is my story.

As a child I watched my mother suffer from domestic abuse for all of my childhood my earliest memory was her sitting on my bed crying and bleeding from a split eye.  As I grew up I thought a volatile abusive relationship was normal probably because my friend's parents were the same.  I went on to having relationships myself many of them similar to my parents, having watched my parent's relationship I possibly endure more abuse than I should.  When I met and married my nearly ex husband I thought I had finally found someone who would treat me right, oh how wrong was I, in the beginning he was lovely took me out, bought me presents, took me on holiday and treat me like I was a princess.  Slowly the controlling started little by little stopping me from working in a night club, saying that some of my friends were not right to be with even to the point of saying that my brother was just using me to gain what he could, he just wanted me to be away from all my family and friends.  Soon after we were married he began to stop giving me money for the bills, so I got behind with the rent and council tax.  He used to make me ring up and lie, saying he had been out of work and would catch up when he could.  If I refused to lie I was punched or slapped, told that nobody else would ever want me because I was fat, ugly and lazy and that was my good points according to him!  You might think I was some young naive girl when I married but I wasn't, I was 28 and had always thought of myself as strong and positive.  I came accross 608030 by accident, my friend had said did I fancy going to the Community House for a cuppa (I now think she knew I was suffering a lot more than I was letting on) which is how I got involved with W.O.W. (Women on Wednesday).  As I got to know the workers I slowly opened up to what was going on.  I had a lot of issues from my childhood that I needed to deal with but really was afraid to look into.  My Man died in 2007 just before I began to use the services of 608030 my husband even used her death to abuse me in his words still hurt even now "it's your fault your Mother's dead, you killed her!"  My Mam died from Cancer, I couldn't do anymore than I did.  All my life I have tried to please everybody, all I ever wanted was to make everybody happy.  When I was diagnosed with Depression I was told by him "to take all them bloody tablets cos there not working!"  No help, support or love from him just more abuse.  After a lot of very painful and deep counselling I finally realised that I wasn't mad, I was in an abusive relationship.  I have now left that marriage and I'm nearly divorced have a lovely new partner who does treat me with respect and loves me for who I am.  Possibly after all that you could say I'm MAD because MAD stands for Make A Difference and I did, I got out.  I now know I'm better stronger person and I don't crave anybody else's approval anymore.  My new motto is; "if you don't like me then I don't care" because I know that I don't have to please everyone now, just the people that matter.  Without the help of 608030, I wouldn't be where I am now possibly I wouldn't be here at all.  The service they provide is so important for women in my position, without them many women wouldn't be here today.

THANK YOU 608030 I owe you so much.