Advice
KEEP YOURSELF SAFE
Please beware, the information below is for guidance only and may not completely cover your tracks. To be totally sure of not being monitored online, access the internet at your local library, friends house or at work.
Internet browsers (Internet Explorer, Firefox, Netscape, Opera, Safari) will save certain information as you surf the internet. It will leave a history that will show the sites you have visited.
These websites give helpful guidance - Computerhope.com and MVPS.org
Children
The Effects on Children of Domestic Abuse
Variables that need to be taken into account when investigating the effect on children of domestic abuse include:
| • | Age | • | Gender |
| • | Culture | • | Race |
| • | Development stage | • | Personality |
| • | Family Circumstances |
Feelings that may be reported by children include:
| • | Ambivalence towards both offending and non-offending parent | • | Anxiety |
| • | Anger/aggression towards mother, other adults and siblings | • | Confusion |
| • | Fear | • | Guilt |
| • | Isolation | • | Lack of Trust |
| • | Loss of confidence | • | Powerless |
| • | Shame | • | Stress |
As a result of living with or witnessing domestic abuse, children or young people may:
| • | Experience direct abuse |
| • | Become anxious or depressed |
| • | Be particularly anxious if mother is absent |
| • | Be protective of mother/siblings by physically intervening, withholding information, getting help etc |
| • | Show advanced maturity and sense of responsibilty or act younger than their age |
| • | Have suicidal or homicidal thoughts or actions |
| • | Have difficulty sleeping |
| • | Experience nightmares or flashbacks |
| • | Wet the bed |
| • | Complain of being unwell |
| • | Become aggressive and/or have temper tantrums |
| • | Exhibit signs of physical abuse (either inflicted by self or others) |
| • | Become a victim or perpetrator of bullying and/or start truanting |
| • | Experience difficulty in concentrating on school work |
| • | Focus on school and attaining good results as a way of blocking out difficulties at home |
| • | Experience difficulty in making friends at school |
| • | Become withdrawn |
| • | Develop an eating disorder |
| • | Use drugs or alcohol as a way of escaping from their problems |
| • | Run away from home |
These indicators are not conclusive evidence that a child is affected by domestic abuse, but the presence of one or more should alert workers to the possibility that domestic abuse may be at the root of the behaviour.
Moving away
THINKING OF LEAVING?
Keep yourself safe, plan carefully, sometimes abusers will become more violent if they suspect you are leaving, this is a dangerous time.
Here is a list of items to pack in your emergency bag.
| - | set aside a small amount of money each week or open a separate bank account |
| - | a form of identification |
| - | birth certificates for you and your children |
| - | passports (including passports for all your children), visas and work permits |
| - | bankbooks, cheque book, credit and debit cards |
| - | keys for house, car, and place of work |
| - | cards for payment of child benefit and any other welfare benefits you are entitled to |
| - | driving licence, car registration documents (if applicable) |
| - | prescribed medication |
| - | copies of documents relating to your housing tenure (mortgage details or lease and rental agreements) |
| - | insurance documents, including national insurance number |
| - | address book |
Law
Non-Molestation Orders (sometimes known as Injunctions)
| Explanations of terms used: | ||
| Applicant |
- |
the person applying for the Injunction/Order |
| Respondent | - | the person whom the Injunction/Order would be made against |
| Binding | - | 'legally enforceable' (in the case of an Injunction this means that if a Respondent breaches the order, he or she can be arrested by the Police and punished by the court) |
| To breach an Order | - | when a person does something which the Court Order forbids them to do |
| Undertaking | - | a written promise to the Court (sometimes used instead of a Court Order) |
The Law understands that breakdowns in relationships between family members are difficult and particularly distressing. The Law does not expect a person to put up with violent, aggressive or intimidating behaviour from another person simply because there is a family relationship between them.
There is a piece of legislation called the Family Law Act 1996 which deals with all kinds of problematic family relationships which might result in the need for legal protection. Under Part IV of that Act there is the provision for a person to make an application to the Court for a Non-Molestation Order. This is commonly known as an Injunction. This is an Order which, if granted, prevents a Respondent from using or threatening to use violence against an applicant or instructing or encouraging anyone else to do the same. It would also prevent them from intimidating harassing or pestering, or instructing or encouraging anyone else to do that. These applications can be made urgently (they can even be made on the same day if the circumstances warrant it). An urgent application can be made without giving notice to the Respondent if there is a possiblility that the Respondent would try to prevent you rom getting to Court. This is known as making an application ex parte.
The application is supported by a sworn statement from the Applicant, setting out the incidents and behaviour which have led to the Court proceedings and tells the Court why the Applicant feels they need protection in the form of an Injunction. If the Judge was satisfied that they needed the protection, an Order would be made. The Order is only binding upon a Respondent as soon as it had been served upon them. A Respondent cannot be expected to abide by the termsof an Order if they do not know it exists.
The Order, when served, would contain in it a date for a further Court Hearing, to which the Respondent can come and put their side of the story forward. The Applicant would also have to attend that Hearing, although arrangements can be made if an Applicant feels they cannot be in the same Courtroom as the Respondent.
If the Respondent did not attend then you would usually be granted the Order that you seek. If the Respondent did attend, they have three basic options.
|
1. |
Firstly they can agree to the Order being made, in which case the matter would conclude that day. |
|
2. |
Secondly they can object to the Order being made but could agree to offer the Court a formal written promise, know as an Undertaking, in the same terms as the Court Order. There is a very significant difference between offering a written promise to the Court and having an Order made. Breach of a Non-Molestation Order is a criminal offence whereas breach of an Undertaking is Contempt of Court. If an Order was made and it was breached, you would be able to call the Police to arrest the Respondent. If the Respondent breached an Undertaking you would have to make an appointment to see us and you would bring the matter back to Court as a Contempt of Court. The protection is therefore not as immediate. More often then not, in circumstances where the allegations of violent or intimidating behaviour are serious enough, the Court will refuse to accept an undertaking and would rather that an Order was made to protect the vulnerable party. |
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3. |
A third option for the Respondent at a Court Hearing is to contest the application in its entirety. They would then be given a date by which he (or she) could file their statement in response and the matter would be set down for a trial - at which time you wold both give evidence. A Judge would then make a decision as to whether an Order was necessary. |
It is possible to ask for the Non-Molestation Order to include provision that the Respondent is not allowed to return within a specified distance of you house (for example fifty metres around your property).
We would caution you that Non-Molestation Orders are designed to be urgent emergency remedies to recent and significant threats of violence or intimidating behaviour. These Injunctions work best where the Court is asked to react to something that has happened rather than to suppose what might happen in the future. If the Respondent turns up at your property and you feel threatened or intimidated, then your first port of call is to the Police, who will deal with initial contact from the Respondent. If you then feel the need to make an application to the Court for an Injunction to prevent any further contact, then you would contact a specialist solicitor.
Financial
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